it`s mothers` day today. if u haven given ur mom a hug or kiss and wish her and tell her u loveeee her. GO AND DO IT NOW. or u`ll regret it. trust me.

everyone is out there enjoying themselves with their moms. the family lunches and dinners, the presents, the joy and laughter. yes i am so emo-ing. the whole day. since the time i woke up to like now. my stomach was in knots and i swear there were more than jus butterflies in there. only God knows wat else. i wasn`t this depressed last year today as far as i remember.

went to church and din expect to stay out or anyting. so i din bother to dress up or put make up ( i looked a mess.) anyhows, initial plan was to go church, visit mom, come home and cry. but. to my surprise, my aunt wanted to take me shopping after church. i was rather reluctant to go cos i was feeling damn shitty and in no mood to shop. not even if u put tat $219 levis jeans in front of me. it was quite bad. so i jus told her i wasn`t feeling too good and i wanted to go back early to rest. then she decided to head down to my mom`s wif me. T_T i wanted to go alone and stay a lil longer to pour out my woes to my mom. but cos she was there, i couldn`t stay too long or let out exactly everyting. sighs. so we headed down to the columbarium and then to heeren. walking down town surrounded by families jus made me feel worse. =S but my aunt was really nice. she got me earrings shoes and a handbag. so it cheered me up a lil. then we also got earrings for my grandma. i shld go visit her soon. i miss her. yeap, then we bought dinner and she sent me home. i`m very fortunate i know. thank God for aunty mylene then.

so laters, i came home and bummed in front of the tv. watched parent trap and then deal or no deal. then halfway watching, my OTHER aunt called me. yes AUNTY SHIRLEY. i`m not afriad to put her name here ok. she`s been pissing me off ALOT lately. so she called me and started going on and on about how i should go out with her and this and that. she was jus bitching to the other aunties in church abt me last sunday RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. YES RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. she told the other aunties tat i tink she`s old and not cool and watever shit. fuck when did i ever say tat. look at how she is, how do u expect me to talk to her, much less confide in her??!! going out with her now would be a chore. she`s been saying the freaking same things to me and GOd knows who else.

she keeps telling the world how some girl in church is so nice to her, keeps going out wif her and how she wish i`m lik tat. since my mom is gone, she`s like a mother to me and watever. bla bla bla. come on. DON compare me wif others ok. she`s been doing that since i was mayb 3?? damn. i can`t believe i took her shit all these years. it`s time to speak up for myself. when she called and started ranting, i kept quiet at first cos i din wan to start a fight. but then she wont stop. so i got irritated. then i jus told her ok i`m going to watch tv. then she sed: oh don`t wan to talk to me now is it?

waaaa i snapped. i sed in a damn pissed off tone: u`ve been saying the same tings to me every week. ......

then she got it. then i jus hung up la. enough is enough ok. every sunday i get it from her leh. see her in church not enough. she`ll call me later to continue. #$%^&* how bloody sickening is tat. when she calls me, it`s damn expected wat she`ll say. she`ll either talk abt the above, guys or sex to me. yes and it`s not lik 5min convo ok. T_T imagine wat i go thru. NOT FUNNY. CANNOT LUFF. ok fine i shall not go on anymore.

so yes i was damn pissed off. and then my laptop has some problems now. it keeps hanging for God knows wat reason. i hafta restart my com again and again. i swear yesterday and today alone i turned on the com twice and i restarted it more than 10 times. i feel lik throwing this shit away. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but luckily guo liang sed he`ll help me take a look at it. so let`s pray there`s no virus or watever. i`m NOT bringing it down to acer again.

i`m hurting all over now cos of my sunburn. especially my back and shoulders. i look lik a lobster and it`s quite bad. cos i only put sun block on my face, my face looks normal but the rest of my body from my neck down is jus red. how retarded is tat. T_T went to sentosa wif zanna yesterday and met xue laters. i will put the pictures up another time. i`m lazy to load them now and since my com is giving me so much problems, i better publish this b4 it`s gone. ok i`m grumpy and watever now. i`m gg to watch america`s next top model and go to bed. bye.

omg i jus realised i took lik 1 hour to blog this. O_o yes. ok bye.